How I define success is up to me. And my most important success is my relationship with myself. My most loving relationship with me is how I show up as the most focused, grounded, and compassionate version of me for my friends, family, and clients. And my most loving relationship with me includes not holding myself to the high demands of a rigidly structured schedule and task list.

In taking tiny steps and celebrating the tiny wins, I’m bringing so much more joy into the journey along the way. That’s where the dopamine comes from. That’s how I make changes in my life that last. But all that mindset stuff takes practice.

There’s a difference between thoughts you believe in your heart and just need practice to remind yourself of, and thoughts that you don’t believe at all. One of these works as an affirmation, and one isn’t going to work because your brain is going to call bull.

Forcing yourself to try to do something consistently when your brain isn’t consistent is a recipe for bad times. So what if, as we’re trying for that goal, instead of aiming for consistency, we embrace the idea of faltering and restarting. What if any effort is progress, whether or not it’s consistent?